What are your values?

[Nancy B]

Great call last night!

As promised I'm starting a thread where we can all share our list of values. As we discussed last night, positive change happens when we take positive action. So here's the opportunity.

"As you continue to rediscover yourself by exploring your inner landscape, clarifying your values can help you to understand yourself on a much deeper, more spiritual level."
~ Cheryl Richardson...Stand Up for Your Life p 64

Values pull us towards them. They inspire us. They give us clarity and make decision making easier.

We had several beautiful examples last night of people who made decisions easily because they were clear about their values. Terry turned down a high powered job because it would rob her of time for her creativity. Marta realized beauty was a value for her and is using that to make decisions about what she wants and doesn't want in her house. When we know what's important to us its easier to decide what's right for us.

Cheryl has a complete list of values in Chapter 2 of "Stand Up for Your Life." Choose the 4 that are most important to you and list them here. Feel free to add any value you don't see. This is also a great place to ask any questions you have about values or the process of choosing them, or how we use them in our life.

My 4 values
Learning
Love
Beauty
Simplicity

Next...

[sagithree]

Hi Nancy! :)

Thank you and Sally & Sharon for hosting the telegathering! Last night was my first one. I found it interesting and inspiring. And the topic was ideal for my own present situation: passing up good for great.

Funny, how we go through daily life without thinking about what we truly value. We stay in relationships that are painful, go to work that drains us, we seem to go through motions that have become habit. WHY?! Are we nuts?! LOL

I met with a career counselor who gave me an exercise of prioritizing cards with various values on them. It was a challenging task to do. I hadn't realized, I wasn't clear about what I valued. I'm working on it. But here are 4 I know are important:

* creativity
* honesty
* compassion
* nature/animals


:)

[manders]

Nancy,

I really enjoyed the teleconference last night. I am trying to figure out if there is a specific place I need to apply this principle right now.

My four values are Peace, Beauty, Integrity, and Learning.

I always had a hard time making up and absolute yes list, but these values have become that list.

Marta

[Joanne1]

Hi Nancy
I enjoyed the Teleconference call. It was my first call. Hopefully I will have the courage to participate in the next call.
Passing up good for great was a topic that really hit home and I beleive I will be able to make better decisions if I keep that in mind. I often do things because I feel it is expected of me instead of what I really feel. For example in a few months I will be eligible for a promotion to another position. I don't want another position and I have been worring about how to turn it down for weeks. I enjoy the position I have now. I have acquired job knowledge and am now the technical expert. I am respected and my coworkers come to me for assistance. I have been on my job for a number of years and am very comfortable. I don't dread comming to work. I can come and go as I please without any problems. I don't want to give that up. My position suits me fine and I am able to pursue other interests. If I went to the next level I would be starting over from square one with 8 months of classroom training, mentoring etc. At this point in my life I have no time or patience for that. So when that opportunity comes around I am going to pass with no regrets because I am happy where I am.
I hope that I understood what passing up good for great means because when I heard the discussion my job situation is what came to mind.
My values are:
Serenity
Stability
Knowledge
Courage---which needs a little cultivating.
Joanne

[rosebud2004]

Hi Nancy,

Unfortunately, I missed the teleconference call, but I wanted to post my values. It was difficult to narrow them down to four, but mine are:

--Legacy
--On purpose
--Abundance
--love

I first did this excerise last year. When I did it again a couple of months ago, I thought my values might be different. They remained the same.

Tam

[Nancy B]

Wow. What a lot of wisdom, clarity and positive action!

Laura, sounds like your on your way. We'll be watching for your Life Makeover Group posting! Delighted you took the time to introduce yourself!

Tam, it is neat to look at values a year later. There's something that gives us roots when we find our values remain constant (though sometimes I've been surprised by a shift)!

Joanne, sounds like your cultivating courage with the actions you're taking. Feel free to jump into the conversation on the calls whenever you're ready.

Marta, what a beautiful way to use values! How powerful to say: "Does this fit my values?" When making a decision.

Sagithee, welcome to the telegatherings! Hope you'll continue to join us. It is amazing the difference clarity about our values makes.

For everyone else, its not to late to list your values. Look forward to getting together with everyone Monday night!

[helen8]

I finally did the exercise in Cheryl's book. My values are:

Serenity
Health
Inspire
Be Linked

They kind of surprised me and in a certain way did not. They are a real help in focusing in on who I am when I lift off the layers. This represents my values without the other influences that have masked who I really am.
Wow!!

[Caroline]

Hello, I'm new to the program. I am trying to get a life Makeover group established in Somerset County New Jersey and am hoping to learn from this forum.

My Values:

Family
Creativity
Individuality
Faith (God)


Newbee,
Caroline

[tamakay]

Today's values:

Love
Friendship
honesty
kindness

[cafarr]

Nancy, sorry i missed this session, will definately get plugged in. My values inspire, sustain and comfort me:

Love
Creativity
Simplicity
On Purpose

They have followed me throughout my life, and when i've gotten "off track" the Universe usually sends me a sign to reconnect.

Blessings Be,
Cathi

[Nancy B]

Cathi,

I know what you mean about values inspiring and sustaining. They have a way of pulling us forward in our life.

Hope you can join us on the telegathering tonight!

[prieven]

Hi Nancy,

My values are:

quite (time alone/personal space)
calm (feeling peaceful)
balance (between work, self, family)
learning

Tonight's (9/8) virtually LM group helped me a lot. It was my first time attending your telegroup and won't be my last. It really was worth my time. Thank you for having a group that is lead by professionals such as yourself. I'm looking forward to your next telegroup meeting.

Question: Once you finish the last chapter in the book "Stand up for your life", will you start with Chapter 1 again since I jumped in your group covering Chapter 7 already?

Thanks again,

Nancy from Boston

[Nancy B]

Nancy,

Glad you enjoyed the group. We do have fun! And thanks for sharing your values. There's something powerful about writing them down and sharing them with others.

When we finish 'Stand Up for Your Life' our group won't end. We'll continue with Cheryl's life enriching material. Stay tuned for updates, and remember that its participation from people like you that makes this all work for all of us.

[Emmybear]

I am in class two nights a week as well as working full time so I can't make the gatherings. Just know that Iam plugging along.

[Nancy B]

Emmybear,

We're delighted you're with us and I'll keep posting the life work we agreed to do so you can move right along with us.

Hope you're finding some time for self care and nourishment in your busy schedule!

[Yiska]

I have a question!

I'm new and plan to log in Monday night, the 13th. I have to say that this exercise was not easy. When I first read it in the book, I chose four things that either "jumped" at me or I new was very important to me. Those are my original values:

Humor (what I aspire to have, and admire in others)
Truth
Integrity
Beauty

Then I printed it in red paper and placed it in front of my desk. As I hear people talking, as I continue to read more, and as I remember past decisions, slowly I re-shape my values. I noticed that Truth and Integrity were related. "Integrity" being a self application of the "Truth", so I eventually crossed Truth out and substituted it with "abundance."

Now, it came "Humor". I realized that it was something I admired, and wanted to develop, but wasn't always a must. So I replaced it with "Fun" which is more of a general feeling that I like:

Fun -- (which relates to humor, happiness, and being casual)
Abundance -- (which gives me a sense of freedom and security)
Integrity -- (the self application of Truth)
Beauty -- (adventure, elegance, peace)

That's how I came to my values. Now I am in the process of analyzing my professional life, and trying to see where I can place myself so I would honor all four values.

I am in Real Estate. A perfect place for abundance, integrity, and beauty. But, does anyone have an idea how being a realtor can be fun? What is fun about real estate? Or what I can do to make it fun? Generally realtors are so mean to one another, so money and time hungry. They have big egos too (which I don't), so I don't like the competition. The clients also are really uptight about making a decision, and wanting answers fast. Or they change their minds too much out of fear. It is not fun when you get lost while showing houses, and it is not fun when a loan is denied in the last moment, or when people over price their houses, or waste your time just "looking". I know that there are many boundaries that I can set in place, but how can I make the interaction with the people fun? Besides, being a realtor, I work alone out of my house. It is not fun working alone or with a partner that is a pain in the neck or that doesn't do their share. I'm open for your ideas on having fun and being fun. Thanks,
Jesica.

[EmilyD1037]

I am going to list four, but they may not all be my base values. Will need to work on it for a while.

1. Learning
2. Abundance {includes stability and balance}
3. Honesty {includes integrity and excellence}
4. Humor

This was a great assignment.

[Nancy B]

Jesica,

What a beautiful example of refining your values! Its amazing how when we think about what is important to us we get clearer and clearer.

I have never been a real estate agent but I have bought and sold 7 homes in the past 27 years so I can tell you my experience from the client end.

My favorite real estate agents:
~ got that this was one of the biggest events of my life and treated me with TLC.
~ spent some time getting to know me and what was important to me in choosing a home.
~ looked out for my best interest.
~ explained why asking too much for my home wasn't in my best interest.
~ helped me get all of the loan info in early so I wasn't disappointed by looking at houses out of my range.
~ gave me advice on simple things I could do to improve the salability of my home.
~ reminded me to keep my sense of humor.

If I were a real estate agent I'd have fun:
~ seeing people's homes and how they live.
~ feeding my curiosity about what people want.
~ matching the right people to the right property.
~ making a sale.
~ meeting interesting people.
~ learning about people's behavior under pressure and how I could help them have a pleasant experience.
~ helping people get through the process smoothly.
~ building relationships with other agents that felt like I did.
~ networking in my community.

No job is fun 100% of the time, but if you're not having more than your share of fun look first at your perspective. If that doesn't change anything you may want to consider whether its necessary to have fun in your job, and if so if this job is for you. These are the wonderful questions knowing our values lead us to. What fun!

[elsie]

Hi Nancy
I would like to be able to listen to the tele-gatherings but live in Australia. Is it possible for me to do that from over here. If so, could you please tell how I'd go about it. I have all of Cheryls books and get a great deal out of them. I feel listening in would motivate me even more to apply her wisdom into my every-day life. I also enjoy the knowledge and wisdom you share with us on these message boards.
Thanks & Best Wishes

[Nancy B]

elsie,

We've had several people join our call from Australia and other countries. Consult your telephone book or operator on the process to call the United States. Look forward to having you on the call!

[SavannahM]

I have been reading this thread even though I missed the teleconference- and I did the exercise in Cheryl's book on values so I could understand what my own were...and it was surprising.
Surprising because I had gotten so far away from what my core values are and in doing this work was reminded of what is important to me...it was very freeing. All of the sudden it felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders when I could see how I have not been living in line with my values and I can start making choices and changes to get back in line with them. NOW.
That felt really good.
For days I have been walking around repeating my values to myself to remind me. And each time I feel a surge of energy.
It feels so great. My values came out as:

1) Be joyful (this encompasses so much to me:serenity,faith, peace, love, & quiet time)
2) Be passionate (this to me means giving to the world the joy that I feel, love, & my special gifts from God)
3) Dream (oh-but anything is possible)
4) Create

Thanks for helping me re-discover my values!
--Savannah

[Caroline]

Note to self: I am working to craft a new work-life formula. I know a successful outcome will result if i honor and incorporate my values. At the moment, these values seem to ring loudest and clearest.

Family
Faith
Fun
Purpose

Keep these in your fore-thoughts. Now go start your business plan!

[Caroline]

Values list as of 11/25/03

Family
Faith ( Spirituality, God)
Health
Open-minded