August: Baby Steps--Curing Procrastination

[rosebud2004]

According to Cheryl, community is an extremely important ingredient for success. Also, announcing your goals and dreams to the universe and taking steps towards them.

This thread is for those who already have a major goal , and are breaking it down into small steps. Here’s the rundown: State a MAJOR goal (or two), and then for each week or so, figure out what baby steps you’ll need to take to move you closer. That’s it.

Post them right here in public (gasp!)--the three baby steps you’d like to take. As a result, things will begin to happen:

--There are some things you will do just to have something to post. Those still count!

--Others here will check up and see how you are progressing. You will encourage others

--Also the kudos you’ll get from others here can egg you on to do more. “Praise makes you brave” - Barbara Sher.

Please state what the big dream is that you're working towards so we can all hold that end result firmly in mind as you take the weekly steps.

Good luck and remember that "All glory comes from daring to begin",

Tam

[rosebud2004]

One of my goals is to enter a genetic counseling program in the Fall of 2004. This is a challenge for me because it has been 10 years since I graduated from college. There are also only 20 schools that offer the program and none are in my area.

I have already:
--interviewed a genetic counselor
--investigated the Graduate Record Exam testing dates
--began researching the genetic counseling programs
--began researching volunteer opportunities ( a requirement for most programs)

The steps that I will take towards that goal this week are:
--make a final decision on which universities to apply to
--purchase a GRE study guide
--choose a volunteer counseling position

Tam

[sagithree]

Congratulations on showing such courage & strength!

Rosebud, I read your post the day after you wrote it. It's been on my mind since. I myself have been toying with the idea of doing what you just did: setting up weekly postings with others, setting goals for (gasp!) everyone to see! What better way to hold ourselves accountable. And to get the support we need to keep going forward.

I admire your risk taking. Putting yourself on the line here with your goals. Fantastic! You ARE an inspiration! I applaud you on all the work you've done so far! Good for you!

I'm here to join you...I am in need of a life overhaul! But I choose to start with a new job. What I discovered was a lot of clutter in my life that distracts me, drains my energy, affects my concentration in prepping for the job search.

My first goal, is to de-clutter my office. I got a clipboard, attached my list of all the things that need to be filed, sorted, thrown away. I'm pleased to say, I'm halfway through the list.

I tend to lose momentum. By posting here, I hope to follow all the way through. I've tried getting a support system in place. The women in one group weren't serious about goals and making life changes and I have a buddy who is afraid to keep me accountable. Even though I told her it's ok to.

We have to keep trying to get what we want. I'm not giving up. I see you haven't either. I like that in a gal! :) You're empowered.

Thanks for being the "pioneer" and being the first to start these weekly goal posts! I'm ready for an adventure. New lives, here we come! :)

[rosebud2004]

Hi Sagithree,

Welcome!!

I created this thread in the belief that if you announce your dreams/goals to the universe and take steps toward them...the universe will help. Since, the creation of this thread, I have found the most fantastic goal buddy. She has just completed her graduate program and is currently working on her thesis. It was my hope that this thread would encourage and inspire others to work toward achieve their goals.

Looking forward to your next post and I'm here to support you!

Tam

[sagithree]

You're absolutely right that things start happening when we state clearly, what it is we want and begin to take action. It's like the energy in the Universe starts moving around.

I've had it happen a few times already, so I know it works. One of my goals was to stop doing everything on my own. I've been actively seeking like-minded people who are willing to reach for "more".

Little by little I'm making progress. I started by seeing a career counselor. That revealed some personal problems that lead to my seeing a personal counselor to deal with self-esteem issues. I got the courage to start searching around for a group to work with in working towards goals. I'm learning a lot about myself through these encounters too. I've learned, I need to be clear about what I want. I do get apprehensive sometimes in speaking up. I was afraid of the response I'd get from others about me. Or, that I might offend someone with my response to them.

I had to get over it. I've been continuous in posting. I've practiced taking that risk to talk openly with others; I feel more courageous. So that is yet another goal that I've worked on in getting here, to where we are today.

I'm so glad you found a goal buddy to work with! As I've heard it said many times before....you can never have too much support! :) I'm happy to support you too! :)

I think it's fantastic you're going back to school. I love learning. I take classes periodically in whatever catches my fancy; photography, finances, writing....I'm always reading too...there are so many interesting things to learn in this world!

Keep us posted on what's happening! This is so exciting what your embarking on! Don't worry if ya get the jitters...just let us know if that little fear voice yells too loudly...we'll be here to help ya conquer it. You're obviously a determined woman who when she decides to do something, she does it. That's terrific! :)

Chat with ya later!

[rosebud2004]

It's been a week since my first post and it's time to check in. Last week, I listed three baby steps to accomplish during the week:

--make a final decision on which universities to apply to
--purchase a GRE study guide
--choose a volunteer counseling position

--I have chosen 10 schools. I will probably apply to 7 on my list.

--I didn't buy GRE study guide because my finances are tight, but I did borrow two from the library.

--I haven't found a volunteer counseling position. I'm having difficulty finding one that fit my time constraits. I do have a few good leads though. This is a very important requirement for the genetic counseling program. So I have to find something.

My baby steps for this week are:

--Spend at least 5 hours this week studying for the GRE
--Find a volunteer counseling position
--Find out how and cost to order my college transcripts.
--Begin investigating financial aid


Tam

[Mermaid]

Thanks for posting this excellent thread, Tam! Congratulations on your progress. I would like to help support you, and I have two major goals I'd like to share and for which I need support:

1) I have started a new business. To be honest, I've been passive in my marketing efforts and need to "ramp up" my activities and commitment.

This past week I connected with another business owner and discussed the potential of referrals, inquired about membership in a professional organization and committed to donate free and half-off services as prizes in a raffle for a local group.

This week I will: finish & distribute my press release; inquire with two more professional groups; begin distribution of fliers to appropriate businesses; prepare & mail sign and certificates for the raffle.

2) I am going to clean & sell my home and move next year.

I have been cleaning my house and have decided to hold an auction to sell items I no longer want and/or need. This past week I contacted two auction services and contracted with one. My auction will be held on Sept. 8.

This week I will: finalize, clean and inventory my auction items (some of this has already been done); gather info about places of interest to fine-tune where I'd like to move.

Thanks again for this great thread!

~Mermaid

[rosebud2004]

Welcome Mermaid,

I applaud your courage in annoucing your goals to the world.
You seem like a woman who know what she wants and how to get there, but just needs a little support and accountability to stay focused. We are here for you!

Glad to have you aboard and looking forward to your follow-up post. This is getting exciting!

Tam

[sagithree]

Hi Mermaid!

Thanks for jumping into the fire with us! LOL ;)

It's comforting to know someone else is willing to challenge themselves too.

Wow! I'm blown away by all you are taking on. I'm assuming you must have a game plan written out with the smaller steps of what you need to do to accomplish the overall goal.

You've made some great moves regarding your biz. Industry organizations are always a plus for small biz owners. I freelanced and that made all the difference to rubbing elbows with others, learning what was happening in the industry; they tend to offer educational events too which is a plus. My own industry (media) also offers things like health & disability insurance, social events (this helps when you spend so much time alone & need a pick me up with human contact).

What industry do you work in? It's hard to offer ideas without knowing a bit more. Your raffle idea is super! Great way to get your services "tried out"; in my industry word of mouth is BIG. If you can get one client more will soon follow.

You don't know where you're moving? LOL I should be talking with you...my goal is to land a new job in another state, but I haven't picked one. Actually, there are areas of the U. S. I like, so I'm being flexible on WHERE I go.

You're an inspiration, Mermaid!!! Keep up the good work! I'm feeling more empowered now to do even more for my own goals! :)

[sagithree]

Ex-cell-ent!!! Nice going, Rosebud! Look out world! Lady in action!!!

Great idea on getting the guide from the library to save money. Why spend it if you don't need to?

Regarding your volunteer position search, do you know anyone in this field you're interested in who you could talk to for ideas about volunteer positions that might fit your time?

You sound upbeat. That's great! Does that doubt voice ever creep up on you? Those "nerves" start rattling because you're making big changes?

Mine do. But I also feel positive energy. I've cleared my desktop! (holy smokes! I haven't seen it in months!) I've emptied several bags of "stuff" I didn't need. Finished one crate (2 more to go): I've dumped half my mags & most of the newspapers that were taking up space. The rest are soon to go. This week will be finishing up this tedious task. Then, I'll be able to move on to finishing my resumes. (I have to do a written and a video version). I've already spoken to an editor to help with the video.

Thanks for starting this thread! I need this accountability!

[rosebud2004]

Hi Sagithree,

Thank you for the kudos!

I am upbeat about where I'm going, but sometimes the little voice of doubt creeps in. I have only recently *rediscovered* my goals. I was so caught in stuff that wasn't feeding my soul and I had forgotten my goals. Now, I am determined not to let anything stand in my way.

I spoke to the volunteer director today and I think we will be able to work something out that's mutally beneficial. I'm amazed that I asked for some flexibility. I'm equally amazed that he was happy to be accomodating.

Congratulations on winning your war with clutter! That is no small accomplishment. I'm really impressed. Freeing up your space will give you room to work physically and emotionally.

I've never heard of a video resume. Sounds interesting. What do you do for a living?

Thank you for participating in this thread. We are well on our way in creating "our best lives"

You go girl,
Tam

[helen8]

I have been following this thread and I need help with procrastination. I have goals that never seem to get any closer because I don't follow through mostly because the anxiety gets too high when I think about change. But the current reality isn't very good and it badly needs to be changed. I need to publicly state some steps towards my goals and report back to the group as to how I'm doing. You all sound so supportive!!

My goals to be completed in one week.

I have a home business and my accounting and filing is a mess. So my first goal is to have all my papers filed and give the bookkeeper my paperwork by next Tuesday.

I have some ideas for volunteer work I want to do. So my goal by next Tuesday try to contact the social agency I am interested in volunteering with to start the ball rolling.

I will do my pilates at least three times during the week.

[rosebud2004]

Hi Helen,

Welcome to this thread! Congratulations in being courageous enough to join this thread and announce to the universe your goals. We are here to encourage, support, and hold each other accountable.

I'm looking forward to reading your progress next week.

Tam

[sagithree]

Ask, and ye shall receive, Rosebud! ;)

Yay! You asked for what you wanted from the Volunteer Director. How many times has this happened to us that we think about what we want but then second guess ourselves or talk ourselves out of speaking out for what we want. We think there's no way we'll get what we want. Or, that we're being greedy, asking for too much. This is something I've been learning to do too.

What's the worst they can say? No. But just because one door closes, doesn't mean another won't open. You keep trying to open all the doors you find interesting. Pretty soon, one of them WILL open. So Good for you for asking!!!

As for me, I've been a freelancer in film/video production. The video is a collection of my work. They're broadcast promotion "commercials" . I need to have this video resume to sell myself and what I can do. It's comparable to a photographer's portfolio of prints she's shot.

Still decluttering...amazing how this stuff accumulates!!! Sheesh!

LOL :)

[sagithree]

I hear ya Helen!

Procrastination is one of my vices. That's why I searched for support. I failed miserably on my own. It's energizing to see others at work making life changes. I feel so inspired after I read what everyone's up to. I feel like I want to get active too.

Don't despair! Lots of paperwork? Hmmm, is it possible to delegate or hire someone to do that for you? If it's not your forte to be neat & organized, it might help to find someone to do that for you so you can concentrate on what you're strong at doing.

If you can't get someone to help regularly, can you afford maybe a one time visit from a professional organizer? They have terrific ideas for organizing stuff and great storage units.

One thing that helped me was to put on some upbeat danceable music. Also, I'm notorious for over-scheduling. I finally got control of the filing, etc by breaking my to do list down into teeny steps. Like: clean only top of desk; file papers on top of file cabinet. And then I'd tell myself, I only needed to do ONE task for the day. It got rid of that OVERWHELM feeling. The mess was more manageable. And if you get restless while trying to file, say you have trouble concentrating on what you're doing, then tell yourself to do filing for 5 mins. only then switch to something else. Gradually increase the increments of time you spend doing these tasks.

You can do it! Break things down into smaller & smaller steps until you can finally do them. Best of luck! :)

[helen8]

Thanks for the support! I will report next week.

[Mermaid]

Hi everyone,

Thanks for the warm welcome, Tam & Sagithree! And welcome, Helen! We're happy you've joined the thread!

How is everyone doing with their baby steps?

I feel I am on track to complete mine by check-in time on Sunday. This has been really great ... I feel the "pressure" to follow through on my word, knowing I will check in for all to see! I've even gotten some minor goals that I have delayed done this week as well.

Congratulations everyone on the progress you've made so far. I'm really looking forward to watching everyone's continued progress as the weeks go by!

~Mermaid

[helen8]

Hi,

I am starting to feel bogged down by the minutia of every day things that end up taking up way more time than I thought--or am I sabotaging myself into not getting my goals met? How do I make sure I have the time to accomplish my goals? How do I make sure that I give my goals enough value so that they do not end up being put off to the side and I fill my days with the tasks that will drain my energy and never get me to where I want to be?

This is the typical pattern that I face. I select my goals and then sabotage my reaching them by being too bogged down by other things.

Thoughts?

[Mermaid]

Helen,

One question leaps to mind: Are you setting appropriate goals? By that I mean - are the goals you're setting things that YOU need to do? If you're not meeting a goal because the task is something you hate doing, can you hire it out to someone else? Or are you simply nervous or anxious about the task because it's something you've never done and fear failure so you avoid it?

~Mermaid

[rosebud2004]

Hi Helen,

I see from your previous post that you work out of your home. So do I. In my case, my desire to do housework was another form of procrastination. I would do the laundry, clean the stove, or run errands. It wasn't that my activities related to my business weren't important. They involved risk. It was safer to do mundane activities (even ones I disliked) than stepping out of my comfort zone and promote myself. It was all about fear.

How did I overcome that...

I have a goal buddy. Since, we are just beginning, we check-in each morning and state our daily goals. We also follow-up on what we did the previous day. Knowing that I will have to talk to her keeps me on track. Once we have some momentum, we will cut out check-ins to once a week.

I first heard of the idea of a business/goal buddy at a SBA networking event. Procrastination is a widespread disease. While you're networking for business, be on the lookout for a business buddy.

Sometimes, I still have trouble. For me, its just getting started.
I tell myself that I will work for only 15 minutes and I time myself with an egg timer. This usually works for me. Once I'm working I don't want to stop because I'm on a roll. For every two hours of work, I give myself 15 minutes of "me" time. It's my reward.

Perhaps, others one this thread will offer additional suggestions and insight.

Good luck and we're here for you,
Tam

[helen8]

Thanks Mermaid and Rosebud (and Tam & Sagithree)
I do need a daily goal buddy to keep me on track and identify whether my avoidance is procrastination, not valuing my goals enough or whatever.... Is there any one of you on this thread that is interested? For me a check during the week days would work because my weekends are generally really busy with commitments to family and friends.

I do find that being accountable to someone else helps me to get somewhere so the goal buddy idea would be fabulous.

Can someone let me know if they are interested and we can exchange email addresses to see if we can succeed.

Your support and interest is incredible. Thanks!!

[sagithree]

See Helen? You're not alone! Several of us immediately related to you.

First, it's important to know clearly what you want to achieve. Have you written out a game plan? Written out in DETAIL what you want?

I surprised myself when I attempted this the very first time. I had trouble detailing what I wanted. I thought I knew what I wanted. I do now. But it took several tries of brainstorming on paper & doing some written exercises to clarify what it was I was looking for.

Can you find a pic from a magazine of what you want? Or maybe write it out on paper, then post it where you'll see it often.

Have you journaled why you procrastinate? Is it fear? Are you locked into an old daily routine? Is it painful to deal with your goal? Does it represent something? Like a mistake from the past. It's helpful to know WHY you avoid doing something so you can create a plan to resolve it.

I'm familiar with doing other "daily tasks" then not having time to work on goals. For me, things like housework, give immediate gratification. As soon as you finish cleaning, you see the results of your labor.

Daily tasks are also avoidance. You're getting closer to your goal with each task you complete. Does that mean a change in your life? Will this bring "unknowns" that you won't necessarily know how to deal with them?

As for making time to do goals, here's a trick I learned: Before doing any other day's task, begin with a GOAL TASK. Set up a block of time first thing in the morning. If necessary, turn off the phone, close your door, whatever it takes, you must create a period of time for just this goal. You may feel resistance to this, but if you focus on achieving the goal and how you'll feel afterwards, it will be easier to stick to the tasks to get that goal.

Hope this helps. And I hope you find a buddy. I already have one. We've been working together for over a year now. It's made a difference in my life for sure. Give it a try! :)

[helen8]

Thanks for your suggestions. I am not doing anything this weekend, but am excited to use these very useful tips when I start again next week.

What a great group. Thanks.

[rosebud2004]

Hi all,

It's the end of another week and time to check in.

As a side note...I've been procrastinating on a huge project for the past two months. I have finally finished it. It has freed alot of my free time as well as emotionally. I no longer have this dark cloud hanging over my head. I have also researched "women in science organizations" in the hopes of finding a mentor.

My baby steps for last week were:

--Spend at least 5 hours this week studying for the GRE
--Find a volunteer counseling position
--Find out how and cost to order my college transcripts.
--Begin investigating financial aid

****
--I spent about 7 hours studying for the GRE. I have a software program that's simulates the actual test.

--I began researching sources of financial aid on the internet. I have also thought of a creative way to get a grant for my education. I'm working on fleshing out this idea.

--I ordered unofficial copies of my college transcripts. This wasn't easy since I have long since forgotten my student id number!

--I still haven't finalized a volunteer position. I've applied to two organizations. Not wanting to put all my eggs in one (or two) baskets, I'm still searching for positions.

My baby steps for this week are:

--Spend at least 5 hours studying for the GRE
--Continue looking for a volunteer position
--Visit the SF Main Library. It has an entire section (room) devoted to colleges. It also has alot of education grant resources.

***

I need your opinion: When I started this thread, I was going to create a separate thread for each month...thus the name August: Baby Steps. Do you think we should keep this thread going or start another for September?

I salute everyone who has been gutsy in participating in this thread. We are changing our lives...one step at a time!

Tam

[bekkybird]

Of course when I think really hard I probably have a lot of goals. But breaking them down into baby steps is hard.....it means that I can actually do things then.

I have just bought Cheryl's book and am reading it slowly. usually I just plough through, but I am taking my time, making notes and doing everything she says.

I guess my major goal is to improve myself. Not be such a wuss. today I took my first major step.....I know this is my first post, so no one new I was going to do it.

I decided I was going to confront one of my bosses about an issue of wages.....I won't go into details. The one I wanted to talk to wasn't here, and the one I didn't want to talk to was. So I just bit the bullet and went in there and said what I needed to say. I didn't get the outcome I was looking for (ie....a pay rise), but I got something much better......self gratification (and an explanation which I can live with). It felt wonderful.

My next goal for this week is to confront one of my colleagues that I had an argument with and set things right. I don't think i was wrong.....and I am certainly not going to apologise. But the way I handled the situation was and I want to clear the air.

One step at a time.


Oooh, oooh.....here is my goal......to enjoy my work more.

I always enjoyed it but lately I haven't and in the end it has come down to me. So these are the little things I am going to try.

-- When I am stressed out I am going to take five minutes for myself.
-- I'm going to say no to extra work when I already have a million and one things to do.
-- When I have a problem with someone I am going to tell them.
-- When a customer abuses me on the phone I am going to let them know I don't appreciate it and I will not be spoken to like that.

Let's see how things go.

This is great guys! I am all jittery inside but it feels great....Like a really good massage!

[helen8]

I am checking in after my first week and I must say it was a great help knowing that I had a goal and someone to check in with who experience some of the same procrastination issues. It was hard to reach my goal and it is Monday at 5:00 p.m. and I am still finishing up what I said I would do.

But I feel that I did not stand still -- My bookkeeper is coming over tomorrow morning and I will have everything ready for her.

I have contacted a colleague re: the volunteer work and he has provided me with information on proceeding further.

I did my Pilates.

Now my baby steps for next week to be completed by Sunday.
1. I will complete my outstanding invoicing and reminder letters.
2. I will do some aerobic exercise three times this week.
3. I will complete a report that has been outstanding for some time.
4. I will work on the chapter re: values in Cheryl's book.

Thanks,

Helen

It doesn't matter to me whether we start or a new thread or continue this one. I have appreciated all your help and hints. Some were things I knew already, but to have someone else say them was a great help. This is wonderful. I am still looking for a goal buddy, but if no one is available, then this seems to work too!!

[thayer]

I have a goal in mind - to get a mystery novel published. I am working on my second draft now, but lately have gotten very good at not writing. The familiar laundry, errands, and TV distractions and the days pass without writing.

So I am here to post my intentions for the week. My three baby steps will be:

1. Write 500 words Tuesday-Friday, every day. This is a baby step because I was writing upwards of 1000. I am being gentle with myself.

2. Walk three times this week, Curves twice.

3. Spend five hours reading about writing.

Thanks, Thayer

[sagithree]

Hi Rosebud!

I think it's a great idea to start a new thread for each month of our working on goals. We don't have to go thru as many posts that way to get to the new ones.

If we get enough people posting goals, we may even want to consider posting each week. Example, "September Goals Week #1" . It's just a thought.

I've got to run. I'm short on time today, but will return tomorrow to post my update on goals. In fact, I'm off to go work on them now! :)

[rosebud2004]

Welcome Bekkybird and Thayer,

To quote Sagithree, "Thank you for jumping into the fire with us!"

Bekkybird, yes when we actually start making progress towards our goals it can be scary. The goal becomes "real", not just a pipe dream. Choosing a goal of standing up for yourself is very admirable. I looking forward to hearing (or reading) of your progress.

Thayer...I love mystery books. When I was younger, I wrote short stories. I hope to buy your book one day...and I can say I knew her when!

Wishing everyone a successful week,
Tam

P.S. I have decided to start a new thread for Sept.

[rosebud2004]

Congrats Helen,

Great job!!! You accomplished alot last week. I know you were struggling. I already have a goal buddy as well. I do wish you luck in finding one. Perhaps a post on this board.


Tam