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Dear Friends,
We now have more of the "You Can Heal Your Life" DVDs back in
stock. You can read about this wonderful movie and see a trailer
here.
This week's "Coach on Call" radio show will be a rebroadcast about "The Art of Brainstorming" -- great ideas for those of you who are
trying to move forward with a dream! I'll be back live on Monday,
February 25th. To listen to the show visit
www.hayhouseradio.com on Monday at 5pm ET (2pm PT, 10pm GMT)
and click on the "listen now" button.
Have a great week...
Love,
Cheryl
p.s. - Need a little Divine Direction? Use the "Touch of Grace" button on our homepage here: http://www.cherylrichardson.com.
"Finish each day and be done with it . . . You have done what you
could;
some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them
as soon as you can.
Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it well
and serenely."
--Ralph Waldo Emerson
We've received tons of feedback about the recent Oprah Winfrey Show
and the new movie, "You Can Heal Your Life." The concepts that were
discussed in both the movie and the show have struck a cord with a
broad audience and the one topic that seems to have had the greatest
impact of all was about forgiveness -- both of others and
ourselves. So, I dug out a prior newsletter on self-forgiveness,
knowing that the most profound changes start there. I hope it
strikes a cord with you...
Prior to sending this newsletter, I had written about the importance
of letting go of the past by forgiving those who had done you
wrong. That newsletter generated a lot of mail from readers. It
seems that many of us are ready to forgive someone so we can find
peace and move on with our lives. But, one community member's email
in particular, shared an important message: "As I read your
newsletter, I was reminded that as much as I have to forgive others,
I need to forgive myself, too, for being my own worst critic, for
without that, I'll never really move on."
So, so true. When we stop to consider those we're ready to forgive,
there's a good chance that we may need to forgive ourselves for what
we see as our role in the situation (whether this thinking is
realistic or not). For example, if you're ready to forgive the spouse
who suddenly left you after twenty years of marriage, you may also
need to forgive yourself for not seeing it coming. Or, you may need
to stop blaming yourself for staying at a job you couldn't stand, at
the same time you forgive your boss for eliminating your position
*before* you could quit.
In hindsight, most of us beat ourselves up for doing something we
later regret. I certainly have. When I look back over my life,
there are several examples that come to mind:
- Staying in a relationship that I knew wasn't good for me
- Not taking better care of my body and getting ill
- Getting myself into debt in my early twenties
- Falling in love with someone's potential instead of facing reality
I'm sure you have your own share of examples, too. As a coach, I've
been blessed to learn about the importance of self-forgiveness by
helping clients to be more forgiving of themselves. For example,
whenever someone started beating themselves up for doing something
wrong, I asked questions like:
- At the time, was it realistic for you to expect yourself to do
something different?
- Did you have the skills or information you needed to make a better choice?
- What about support? Did you have unconditionally loving people
around you to help?
As you might imagine, the answer to one or more of these questions
was often a resounding "No!"
Forgiving yourself for your limitations is a crucial first step in
healing your life. This is the beautiful gift that Louise Hay brings
through her work -- every good thing starts with self-love and
forgiveness -- everything. In an unprecedented time of turmoil and
stress, most human beings are doing the best they can with the
resources, wisdom, and knowledge they have available to them. Yes,
it's important to learn from your mistakes, but eventually you need
to get the lesson and move on. So, check out this week's Take Action
Challenge for something practical you can do to initiate your own
self-forgiveness process.
~*~ Take Action Challenge ~*~
Tonight, before going to bed, find a photo of yourself as a young
girl or boy. Make sure you can clearly see yourself in the picture.
Then, slip into bed early (by yourself if you sleep with someone
else), and stare at the photo (if you can't find a photo, simply put
your hand on your heart and repeat the prayer below). Look deeply
into your eyes in the photo and see the innocence of that little s
oul. Look at your expression, your posture, your hands. Take a few
moments to connect with the vulnerability of being a child and when
you're ready, repeat the following prayer:
"Dear (your name), I forgive you for (the event or circumstance). I
know you were doing the best you could at the time and I release you
from this event forever. I let my self-hatred go and I put the burden
of my limitations in God's hands. I am finished with this memory
forever and I am free. I now move on with my life."
Then, offer thanks and go to sleep. When the event crosses your mind
again (and it probably will), simply repeat, "I forgive myself," and
then dismiss the thought from your mind. If the memory does seem to
linger, try this. Keep the photo of yourself as a child handy and,
when any negative self-talk arises, look at the photo and gently
remind yourself that you'd never speak to this little girl/boy that
way. After a while, you'll find that the memory returns less often
and soon you'll forget about it altogether.
To truly forgive others, we must forgive ourselves first. "Now" is a
good time to start . . .
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