Cheryl Richardson » Newsletters

Week 20 – Mothering Message: A loving reminder of truth

admin — Mon, 14 May 2012 01:04:38 +0000

Greetings!

If you want to create a larger audience for your work, learn about publishing a book or building a successful speaking career, and find out how to use social media to expand your reach, please join me in San Diego on 6/1-6/3 for our Speak, Write, & Promote: Become a Mover & Shaker program. You can learn more here.

Happy Mother’s Day to my mom, Ann Richardson, and my mother-in-law, Pat Gerrish. Both women are such blessings in my life…

Love,

Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

cherylrichardson.com
twitter.com/coachoncall
Facebook.com/cherylrichardson

Topic of the Week

Mothering Message

I recently met a woman who told me that she’s kept the following letter with her ever since I shared it in this newsletter long ago. Inspired by her, I thought it might be a good message for Mother’s Day. After all, extreme self care, at its core, is about good mothering.

When you decide to take time for yourself and you feel a bit uneasy, please remember these words…

Sweetheart,

Don’t worry, you’ll be okay
Slowing down is good
Wisdom simmers and steeps and grows with time

Stop pushing yourself
You are enough just as you are
There is no need to perform

Relax
Let life unfold
You have what it takes to handle anything
Anything

Good things come from patience, not pushing
Let space and time reveal something miraculous
Trust life

Accept where you are
Right now
Stop the judgment and internal lectures
Just be here

Don’t run or think or eat or scheme
Return to yourself in this moment
Where life is perfect and peaceful and safe

Love,

Cheryl

Take Action Challenge

Whether you’re a man or woman, please remember to be a good mother to yourself this week.

This week’s video is a fun look at a special little cat. You’ll find i there. Thanks, Joan!

Life Makeover For The Year 2012 (sm) is written and produced by Cheryl Richardson. If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint permission of this newsletter, please email:cheryl@cherylrichardson.com. © Copyright 1999-2012. Cheryl Richardson, P.O. Box 13, Newburyport, MA 01950. All rights reserved.

Week 19 – True Security: Make deposits that count

admin — Sun, 06 May 2012 23:45:49 +0000

Greetings!

I’ll be going to San Diego on 6/1-6/3 for our Speak, Write, & Promote: Become a Mover & Shaker program. If you want to create a larger audience for your work, learn about publishing a book or building a successful speaking career, and find out how to use social media to increate your reach, you won’t want to miss this weekend. It’s awesome! You can learn more here.

I’m live on the radio this week (5/7 at 5pm ET/2pm PT) and you can listen by visiting HayHouseRadio.com. You can also call for laser coaching at (866) 254-1579.

Have a terrific week!

Love,

Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

cherylrichardson.com
twitter.com/coachoncall
Facebook.com/cherylrichardson

Topic of the Week

True Security

While searching for a resource in past newsletters, I came across a topic I wrote about that’s worth repeating during this challenging economic time. It’s about where real security comes from.

If you’re like most people, you probably equate a sense of security with how much money you have. I know I did. In order to feel safe and protected, I focused on earning and saving money as a way to achieve peace of mind. As I did however, I discovered something strange. My feelings of security and peace didn’t increase with my bank account. Regardless of how much money I earned (or saved), I never felt secure enough.

I’ve since learned that the key to creating security has to do with a whole lot more than the balance in your savings account. It has to do with the balances in other accounts as well. True security comes from having a reserve in all areas of life – a reserve of community, love, self-esteem, a connection to Spirit, and health, in addition to financial reserves. Until you invest in these other areas, you’ll always feel insecure, regardless of how much money you have.

Of course money is important – we all need it to live and to make the kinds of choices that maintain or improve the quality of our lives. But it’s equally important to make deposits into these other accounts as well. For example, consider the following questions:

1. Do you have a reserve of friends and/or family who are there for you in times of need?

2. Do you have a reserve of confidence and self-esteem that allows you to get your needs met?

3. Do you have a reserve of courage that you can call upon when you need to take difficult actions?

4. Do you have a reserve of faith and a strong connection to a power greater than yourself?

5. Do you have a reserve of physical energy?

6. Do you have a reserve of colleagues or professional relationships that will support you and your career?

Just as you make regular deposits to your savings account, you’ll want to start making regular deposits into these other accounts as well. As an example, those of you who are looking for a new job will benefit from networking – getting together with friends and colleagues to share resources, referrals, ideas, and suggestions. Career experts agree that this is still the single, most effective way to land great work. With that in mind, you quickly realize that investing in a professional network creates the kind of protection money can’t buy.

When you view security from this perspective, it’s easy to see that regular dates with your best friend are just as important as regular deposits into your IRA. Or building a reserve of self-esteem is even more important than putting money away for a new home.

It takes time and attention to build reserves in each of these areas and it’s worth the investment. When you do, you not only make for a secure future, you create a secure present as well. And, when the present feels secure, you’ll make much better choices for you and your family.

So, how about it? Are you ready to start making new deposits?

Take Action Challenge

Take a large sheet of paper and create several columns. At the top of each column list an “account category” such as love, community, confidence/self esteem, courage, emotional and physical health, etc. Once you’ve completed these columns, write down your current assets in each of these areas. For example, under “community” you might list close friends and family members. Or under physical health, you might list those things you already do to take good care of your body.

Once you’re clear about what you do have, notice what’s missing. Then, pick one area that needs more attention and make a deposit this week.

This week’s video is an inspiring look at what happened when a man made regular deposits to his emotional, spiritual, and physical health. You’ll find it here. Thanks, Kate!

You’re So Sensitive: The Art of Extreme Self Care

admin — Fri, 04 May 2012 17:29:26 +0000

Greetings!

Many thanks for the feedback about the paperback release of The Art of Extreme Self Care. Here’s another excerpt along with a brief video about “Ways to Protect Your Sensitive Side.” I hope it helps you to see your sensitivity as a gift!

Love,

To order a copy of The Art of Extreme Self Care, click here.

You’re So Sensitive

When I was a little girl my dad used to call me Sarah Heartburn – a funny twist on the French movie actress Sarah Bernhardt – because I had a tendency to be a bit dramatic when things didn’t go my way. The truth was that I was a highly sensitive child. I cried easily, felt deeply hurt when kids called me names or made fun of me, and was prone to bouts of loneliness and a kind of sadness that I didn’t understand. It wasn’t until I read “The Highly Sensitive Person,” by Elaine Aron, as an adult, that I understood what was going on. It was one of those rare experiences when a book seems to put your whole life into perspective and you suddenly understand yourself in a brand new way.

For years I used to beat myself up for being sensitive. Like the little girl who felt too much, as a woman, I still cried easily, felt bowled over by too much stimulation – the kind that came from big crowds, bright lights and loud noises, and was deeply hurt by criticism and mean-spirited remarks. I hated being sensitive – loathed it, in fact, until a conversation with Thomas, my coach at the time, changed everything.

I had given one of my first speeches on coaching and had received criticism on an evaluation for how I presented my ideas. The review was harsh and the pain of it stayed with me for days. During our call, I described the feedback to Thomas, saying, “I hate that I’m so affected by this stuff. You can’t believe what’s gone on in my head since I read that review – ‘I suck as a speaker, forget about doing this for a living, stick to being a coach, kid.’ I’m just too sensitive and I hate it!” Thomas listened thoughtfully as I continued on about how upset I was and when I finished, he delivered one of his classic one-liners that shifted my perspective. “You know, Cheryl,” he said, “the way I see it, your sensitivity is your greatest gift. It’s gotten you to where you are today and it’s what makes you a great coach. If I were you I’d protect this gift rather than hate it.”

Protect my sensitivity? Now there was a concept I never considered before. The idea that my sensitivity might be a blessing rather than a curse encouraged me to think about it in a new way. There certainly were benefits. As a child and as an adult, my sensitivity translated into a keenly perceptive ability to read people. With a tilt of the head, a blink of an eye, or a slight shift in tone of voice, I often knew what someone was thinking or feeling. This ability developed over time into a finely tuned intuitive knowing that allowed me to be quite effective as a coach and teacher. I could anticipate people’s needs. I often knew what a student needed before they knew themselves. As I listened carefully to a client who was trying to find his or her way, I could see a path form in front of them showing us both which direction to go in. And I often found myself choosing – with my heart, not my head – the exact words someone needed to hear.

My sensitive side also caused me to feel deeply connected to nature, animals, birds, music, and art. These qualities and experiences of sensitivity are certainly not unique to me. We all possess a level of sensitivity that, when taken seriously and protected, can open us to a rich and satisfying experience of life. When we’re sensitive, we’re better able to see beauty everywhere and in everything – from flowers to weeds, in joyous experiences and in the poignantly sad ones as well. Sensitive people also tend to be empathetic – kind and compassionate people who can easily put themselves in the shoes of another. They naturally become sensitive to the feelings of others and, as a result, care about how their actions affect the world.

My decision to protect my sensitivity rather than disown it, was one of the most influential acts of Extreme Self Care I’ve ever taken in my life. It gave me permission to be myself – on a soul level – in spite of what the world around me said I should be. And here’s an interesting thing: As I learned to protect my sensitivity, it did the opposite of what I expected. Rather than leave me feeling like a pincushion in a world full of pins, it actually made me stronger and better able to use my gifts. Becoming aware of what I needed to safeguard this gift allowed me to take it out of the box when I wanted so I could use it to my advantage. When you begin making choices that support your sensitive, feeling side, you create the sensory safety you need to open more fully to rich experiences and the beautiful nuances of life. You allow your creativity to flourish, your intuitive muscles to kick in, and you gain access to your heart, connecting you with humanity in a deeper, more intimate way.

If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint permission of this newsletter,
please email: cheryl@cherylrichardson.com.

Week 18 – The Tapping Summit: A healing technique that could change your life

admin — Sun, 29 Apr 2012 15:59:27 +0000

Greetings!

I’m live on the radio this week (4/30 at 5pm ET/2pm PT) and you can listen by visiting HayHouseRadio.com. You can also call for laser coaching at (866) 254-1579.

Have a great week!

Love,Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

cherylrichardson.com
twitter.com/coachoncall
Facebook.com/cherylrichardson

Topic of the Week

The Tapping Summit

Over the years many of you have heard me talk about “tapping therapy” – an elegant and efficient method for dealing with fears, phobias, trauma, addiction, weight loss, and so much more. Tapping uses the body’s energy system (just like acupuncture) to clear away blocks that are keeping problems in place. As you tap on specific points on the body while repeating phrases related to the issue, life-long problems often vanish.

When I first heard about the technique, it sounded too good to be true. Then I experienced it for myself. After my husband Michael was trained in tapping more than fifteen years ago, he successfully treated my fear of flying during a very bumpy flight. After tapping with him for just fifteen minutes, my fear was completely gone (and stayed gone). That’s all it took for me to take this unusual method seriously. I began using it myself and then started sharing it with friends and family. I’ve been consistently blown away by the results.

I share this information with you in this newsletter because I’m such a huge fan of this remarkable healing technique and I want as many people as possible to use it. To that end, there’s an event I want you to know about. It’s called the Tapping World Summit. This virtual summit will allow you to learn all about tapping, how to do it, and what to use it on, from more than sixteen experts in the field (and it doesn’t cost a thing). You can use this technique for things like overcoming a fear of public speaking, losing weight, eliminating physical pain, or ending self-sabotage. It’s an opportunity you don’t want to miss.

To get access to this information, you’ll be asked to provide your name and email address. Once you do, you’ll receive an email with all the info you need to access the summit so you can start using the technique.

I was privileged to do a video interview with Jessica Ortner, to help launch the series (Jessica and her brother Nick run TheTappingSolution.com). Jessica and I talked about a variety of ways to use tapping for self-care issues like setting boundaries, overcoming conflict phobia, dealing with the anxiety that accompanies guilt, and so much more. It turned out to be a very moving and meaningful interview and I hope you’ll watch it. You’ll get the video when you sign up for the summit.

So, to gain access to the Tapping World Summit, simply visit here and fill in your information. Then, once you do, I’d love to hear from you on Facebook about how your life changes.

Take Action Challenge

For a quick and easy introduction to tapping and how you can use it eliminate anxiety, check out the five-minute video I created on my YouTube TV channel here.

This week’s video comes to you courtesy of Esther and Jerry Hicks. You’ll find it here. Thanks, Robin!

Let Me Disappoint You: The Art of Extreme Self Care

admin — Fri, 27 Apr 2012 00:24:33 +0000

Order Today!

Greetings!

I’m excited to let you know that the paperback edition of The Art of Extreme Self Care is available on May 1st. This book is a must-read for those of you who would like to dissolve resentment by getting your needs met; enjoy authentic relationships based on truth rather than trying to keep the peace, and feel more like your life belongs to you instead of everyone else.

You deserve to feel good. I hope you’ll take the time to practice the simple strategies outlined in the book. They will change your life. And please remember, The Art of Extreme Self Care makes a great gift for Mother’s Day, Father’s Day (yes, dads need self-care, too!) and the graduate who could use self-care skills. Here’s an excerpt from the most popular chapter: Let Me Disappoint You. This is one of four excerpts I’ll be sending over the next few weeks.

And, if you’d like even more support for dealing with the guilt that inevitably comes with practicing better self-care, watch this video and learn to live guilt-free. Enjoy!

Love,

Let Me Disappoint You

I hate being disappointed. There’s nothing worse than getting your hopes up only to have them squelched when something doesn’t turn out the way you plan. And that’s precisely why I hate to disappoint others. Over the years I’ve watched myself go on autopilot when someone asks for a favor, saying “yes” when I know in my gut that I’d rather not do it. Or I’ve suffered, spending too much time trying to come up with a graceful way to let someone down so they wouldn’t feel hurt or angry at my “no.”At our core, most of us hate to hurt or disappoint people. As a matter of fact, many avoid it like the plague. Here are a few reasons why:

We want to avoid feeling guilty.
We hate being disappointed or hurt ourselves and we want to spare others the emotional pain of that experience.
We lack the language to say no with grace and love.
We’re conflict phobic so we’ll do what it takes to keep the peace.
We want people to like us.

One of the harsh realities about practicing Extreme Self Care is that you must learn to handle your anxiety when you end up having to disappoint people, hurt their feelings, or make them angry. And you will. When you decide to put an end to the cycle of deprivation in your life, you’ll need to start saying no, setting limits, and putting boundaries in place to protect your time, energy, and emotional needs. This poses a huge challenge for most caring individuals. Why? Because inevitably you’ll end up disappointing a friend when you decide, for example, to honor your need for a weekend off rather than agree to baby-sit her kids. Or, there’s a good chance that you’ll hurt your teenager’s feelings when you tell him to walk to his friend’s house so you don’t have to chauffeur him around for the tenth time this month. And, you can rest assured that you will piss off a spouse who suddenly has to do his own laundry because you’ve decided that you’re no longer going to play house maid to everyone who lives under your roof. Trust me, you’ll be changing the rules of the game and some people won’t like it. But, remember this: If you want to live a meaningful life that makes a difference in the lives of others, you need to make a difference in your own life first. That way your motivation is pure. Feelings of discomfort, guilt, or fear are just part of the process of focusing on your own needs first.

It can be quite surprising to see the lengths we’ll go to to avoid hurting or disappointing people. My conversation with Barbara, a woman who called into my radio show, was a good example. Barbara was aware of her tendency to be a Good Girl and by the time she shared this story with me, she knew exactly what was going on. “I’m about to commit the ultimate good girl act,” she admitted. “For the last six months, my boss of ten years has worked hard to line up a transfer to a new position in a warm part of the country – something I’ve wanted for a long time. But, as I go through the interview process it’s becoming clear to me that the job isn’t what I thought it would be and I’m starting to realize that I won’t be happy. Here’s the crazy thing. Believe it or not, I’m actually thinking about taking the job anyway because he’s really gone to bat for me and I hate to let him down.”

As outrageous as this story seems, I wasn’t surprised in the least. If you think about it long enough, I bet you could come up with your own examples. You agree to take a new client even though everything inside of you screams, “Warning! Warning!” because you don’t want him to feel rejected. Or, you have an argument with your spouse about not having enough time together only to find yourself agreeing to head up a fundraiser for your kid’s school that very night because you want the other parents to know how committed you are. Every day people make significant decisions based on what others want, knowing full well that on some level they’re committing an act of self-betrayal. The good girl (or good boy) habit is a tough one to put down.

So, what happens when you start to disappoint people or let them down? When it comes to practicing Extreme Self Care in the face of our relationships, there’s something you need to know: You may very well lose a few relationships in the process. Up until this point, if you have a tendency to over give, there’s a good chance that you’ve trained the people in your life to expect it. Now, by making your needs more of a priority, you’re changing the rules. Don’t be surprised if someone close to you – a best friend, a family member, or a spouse, tries to pull you back into the fold of compliance. And when this happens, the worst thing you can do is give in. When you do, you give mixed messages and you teach people not to trust your word. Instead you need to be honest, direct, and appropriately remorseful and that’s it. Don’t overexplain, defend or invite a debate about your decision. The fewer words the better.

If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint permission of this newsletter,
please email: cheryl@cherylrichardson.com.

Week 17 – Space Making: Take the springtime challenge

admin — Sun, 22 Apr 2012 22:52:51 +0000

Greetings!

After our first successful “The Next Step” coaching intensive in Atlanta last week, we’ve made an important change to the program. The Toronto event (on June 23rd) will now be limited to 12 applicants instead of 20. This special one-day coaching intensive is for 12 successful business owners chosen by Reid Tracy, president of Hay House, and myself. We’ll spend the whole day together and participants will have a chance to:

Pitch an idea and get valuable feedback on what works and what won’t.
Fine-tune (or completely overhaul) their marketing and social media strategies to reach more people – lots more.
Brainstorm a product, service, or direction for their company.
Hone their presentation/communication skills so they know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that they’re reaching the right people with the right message.
Discover new, unexpected revenue streams just waiting to be tapped.

Toronto’s coaching intensive is on Saturday, June 23rd and we have others scheduled in Sydney, Australia, Washington, D.C. and Pasadena, CA. For more info, visit here.

I’m live on the radio this week (4/23 at 5pm ET/2pm PT) and you can listen by visiting HayHouseRadio.com. You can also call for laser coaching at (866) 254-1579.

Have a terrific week!

Love,

Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

cherylrichardson.com
twitter.com/coachoncall
Facebook.com/cherylrichardson

Topic of the Week

Space Making

Yesterday morning I watched an interior design show that focused the client on clearing clutter from her bathroom. The designers asked the woman to get rid of every product and gadget she no longer used. I was so inspired by the transformation of her room (and her energy) that I got up from the couch as soon as the show was over and cleared my bathroom drawers and closets, too. It felt so refreshing and energizing once I was done!

Over the years, I’ve talked about the importance of living and working in a nurturing environment – rooms that make you feel good about yourself and that reflect what’s deeply important to your soul. This week, as we settle into spring here in the Northeast, I thought I’d encourage you to do a little housecleaning .

Here are some of the challenges you might take on:

Exchange your summer and winter clothes and when you do, pull out the items that you no longer need or love and donate them to a charitable organization (don’t forget to get a receipt for tax purposes!).

Create space in your bedroom. Remove the pile of books next to your bed (the ones that constantly scream “READ ME!”), put clothes away, or move the TV to another room. The idea is to clear out anything that pulls at you for attention and that prevents you from resting your mind by getting a good night’s sleep.

Go through the piles of unread mail and throw out every catalog or every piece of junk mail without thinking about what you “might” be missing. If you’re like most people, there’s a good chance you already have too much stuff anyway. Also, once the piles are gone, train yourself to go through your mail every day, standing next to the recycling bin or trash barrel. That way you handle the problem at its source.

Eliminate one or two social activities that you’d really rather not do and give yourself the gift of some free time. We all have a tendency to say yes to invitations we think we should accept even though our hearts may not be in it. Do others a big favor and make choices out of love instead of guilt or obligation.

Go through your to-do list and let go of the bottom ten items that keep getting recycled to new lists. If they were really a priority, they would have been done already.

When doing a little housecleaning, I invite you to use one of my favorite mantras: “When in doubt, throw it out.” Please remember that a high quality life has far more to do with what you remove from your life than what you add to it. Clutter, stuff, undone projects, and tasks constantly pull at us for attention and drain too much energy from our physical, emotional and spiritual selves. Plug those drains! Use your precious energy for far better things like spending quality time with loved ones or giving yourself the gift of space and silence – gifts that pay huge dividends.

Okay, let’s all start chanting now: When in doubt, throw it out, when in doubt, throw it out, when in doubt, throw it out…

Take Action Challenge

Pick one challenge from above and get it done within the next twenty-four hours. Then, reward yourself with this beautiful, peaceful video. Thanks, Colette! You’ll find it here.

Week 16 – Mirror Neurons: Touching others in a conscious way

admin — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 00:50:56 +0000

Greetings!

I’m live on the radio this week (4/16 at 5pm ET/2pm PT) and you can listen by visiting HayHouseRadio.com. You can also call for laser coaching at (866) 254-1579.

Have a terrific week!
Love,

Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

cherylrichardson.com
twitter.com/coachoncall
Facebook.com/cherylrichardson

Topic of the Week

Mirror Neurons

This morning, I made a cup of tea and sat down to watch an interview with Charlie Rose and Chris Anderson, the Ted conference curator. I love Ted.com. If you haven’t visited the website, please do. It’s filled with exciting, creative, and provocative speeches delivered by great thinkers – scientists, philosophers, technology gurus, and all kinds of people who are passionate about their work.

Each time I visit Ted.com and listen to their talks, I’m reminded that the world is filled with people who are curious, hungry to learn, excited to share compelling ideas, and committed to humanitarian efforts that make life better for us all. In its own way, the Ted community is an agent of change that has the power to lift humanity to a whole new level of consciousness.

As a speaker, watching a variety of presentation styles has taught me the importance of being vulnerable and telling stories. It’s authentic communication and real-life examples that leave an imprint on our hearts and minds long after a talk is done. As Charlie and Chris were discussing the gift of storytelling and the ability to inspire an audience with the spoken word, Charlie said something beautiful: “It’s a magical thing to see somebody walk into a room and be able to, through telling stories, through the magic of their own communication, have (the audience) almost breathing in rhythm with the speaker.”

Chris agreed, and went on to explain, “What’s amazing is that’s what’s happening. There is all this amazing research about mirror neurons and we now know that when one human being does something or exhibits an emotion, the other people watching that person have the same mirror neurons firing in their brains that are causing the same experience and emotion as the speaker. So they actuallyare that person, in a sense, for a moment. “

Wow. I don’t know about you, but when I consider the notion that those listening to me may be mirroring my experience and emotions, I feel a whole new level of responsibility for what I say and do…in any situation.

Now that’s something to think about.

Take Action Challenge

Here’s a fun idea. As you talk with people during the week, ask yourself: “Would I want what I’m saying and feeling right now to be experienced by others?”

Here’s a great ted.com talk. Thanks, Nancy! You can find it here.

Week 15 – Beautiful Black Sheep: Dare to be different

admin — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 00:09:44 +0000

Greetings!

I’m live on the radio this week (4/9 at 5pm ET/2pm PT) and you can listen by visiting HayHouseRadio.com. You can also call for laser coaching at (866) 254-1579. Have a wonderful week!

Love,
Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

cherylrichardson.com
twitter.com/coachoncall
Facebook.com/cherylrichardson

Topic of the Week

Beautiful Black Sheep

“You’re only given a little spark of madness.
You mustn’t lose it.”

-Robin Williams

Several years ago, while teaching The Writer’s Workshop on a cruise ship, our group experienced an important moment that highlighted a universal theme. A brave woman shared that the subject of her book was a departure from the more traditional life she grew up in. The thought of publishing her work for the world to see ignited the pain she felt as an outsider in her family – the unconventional one in a world of convention. Her honesty and vulnerability touched us all and gave me a chance to talk about what I see as the benefit of being the “Black Sheep.”

In all my years of speaking and teaching, I’ve found that those who are most successful at living true and meaningful lives generally come from backgrounds where they don’t fit in. There’s a good chance you know what I mean. You may have felt like an outsider in your family, a flower in a garden of vegetables at work, or the one person who seemed to be dropped into the middle of school by alien beings. If you did (or do), you’re in good company. Most of us who are doing our best to live conscious and authentic lives feel that way.

At one point during the workshop, I invited a surprise guest, Wayne Dyer, to join us to talk about his writing process. No sooner was he seated in the chair, than he began to talk about his key to success: his desire to buck the system and follow a path traveled by few. He was adamant that had he operated within an established norm, he would not have written more than 35 books – books that are published in more than 45 countries today!

Later in the week I invited Julie Barr, a talented comedian performing on the cruise, to talk about her creative process. Talk about out-of-the-box. Her success as a performer and comic artist was evident in her willingness to offer a straight, no-holds-barred conversation about what it takes to write and perform stand-up comedy. Boy, did we laugh!

The courage, commitment, and personal strength required to navigate the rough patches that inevitably come with feeling like an outsider are important qualities to develop. These qualities make you stronger, more convicted, and better able to withstand the pressure when society tries to pull you back into compliance from your position of originality. I like to think of the black sheep experience as a “polishing school” – a training program that allows great thinkers and doers to develop what it takes to shine as they break new ground or conduct some kind of change-agent activity in the world.

The very act of living an authentic life requires you to risk being unusual, different, or strange. It’s the opposite of trying to fit in. Whether you dress or live in a unique way, bend the rules with your own creative slant on life, or follow a curvaceous path that meanders around social norms, the reward lies in knowing that you’re living a real and honest life. Is there anything better? I don’t think so.

If you feel like a black sheep, welcome to the club . Take this week’s challenge and get a little more comfortable in that beautiful skin of yours…

Take Action Challenge

Look for one way, each day this week, to practice finding inner peace in the outer lane of life. Dress a little different, use words that are more reflective of your true nature, or offer an opinion that tilts the boat a bit. Be willing to be you. It’s the best (and only) way to cruise through life…

In this week’s video, we see an unconventional duo that shines. Thanks, Johnny! You can find it here.

Week 14 – Love Lives On: A story of afterlife

admin — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 01:30:35 +0000

Greetings!

I’m live on the radio this week (4/2 at 5pm ET/2pm PT) and you can listen by visiting HayHouseRadio.com. You can also call for laser coaching at (866) 254-1579.

Have a great week!
Love,
Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

cherylrichardson.com
twitter.com/coachoncall
Facebook.com/cherylrichardson

Topic of the Week

Love Lives On

After an interview I conducted in 2009 with James Van Praagh, a well-known medium who communicates with those who have passed on, my friends, Bob & Melissa called to let me know that a dear friend had just died of cancer. They were calling to thank me for the timely call with James. Bob & Melissa are the editors of ofspirit.com, an online magazine dedicated to spiritual topics. And Bob, a former private investigator, is also the creator of a website called, afterlifetv.com - a website dedicated to searching for evidence of life after death.

During the call with James, he talked about how our loved ones may contact us from the “other side” to let us know they’re okay. Well, a few days after Bob and Melissa shared their loss with me, they had an experience that gave them confirmation. I asked Bob to share his story with you. Here’s what he wrote:

“On Monday night we got a call informing us that our dear friend, David (who lived in England) had passed away from cancer early Saturday morning. David was 38 years old.

David had emailed us a few months ago saying that he had a tumor in his leg removed, had gone through radiation and was given the “all-clear” from his doctor. Thinking that the ordeal was behind him, that was the last time we connected. But a few weeks later, the cancer returned and, according to his wife, Phoebe, his health failed quickly and he passed much sooner than anyone expected.

Having learned of David’s death Monday night, Melissa talked with David in her mind most of the day on Tuesday, asking him for a sign that he was okay. Although we know from our work in this field that death is a doorway home and that our loved ones are always in a safe and loving place after their passing, it’s always nice to get confirmation. On her way home at the end of the day, Melissa stopped off at a local sandwich shop. While waiting for the sandwiches to be made, Melissa was standing by the cash register when an employee suddenly picked something up from the counter and handed it to her.

“Here, you want these?” said the girl.

Melissa held out her hand and asked, “What are they?”

As the employee dropped something into Melissa’s hand, she said, “They’re two coins from England. Someone paid with them and they’ve just been hanging around here.”

Melissa held the coins in her hand. “One for me and one for Bob,” she thought. Her eyes instantly welled up with tears, confusing the girl behind the counter.

“You have no idea what you just did,” Melissa told the girl. “We just lost a friend from England and I was asking for a sign from him. Thank you for this.”

With the sandwiches now ready, Melissa grabbed the bag, thanked the girl again and began to leave. That’s when the girl who gave her the coins yelled, “Tell Bob I said hi.”

We have no idea how the girl knew my name.

Melissa and I each took one of the English coins and have been carrying them around with us ever since. We later noticed that the date on Melissa’s coin is 1992 – the year she first met David.

A couple of days later, Melissa talked with David’s wife, Phoebe, by phone. After hearing about all she and David had been through over the last few months, Melissa decided to share her story about hearing from David at the sandwich shop. Phoebe loved her story and even had a story of her own to share.

On Tuesday, the same day that Melissa was given the English pence, Phoebe had to register David’s death certificate with the town. As she walked home, she began talking with David (as she had been doing regularly since his passing). This time, however, she felt as though he was talking back. She was hearing his voice in her head. Sure that it was just her imagination, Phoebe asked David to give her some form of confirmation that she was actually hearing him and not just her own imagination. That’s when she heard David say, “Your mother wants to buy a blue dress.”

The next day, Phoebe saw her mother, or her mum, as they say in England. Although hesitant to ask her mum about what David told her, she knew she needed to find out the truth. So she asked her, “Mum, did you recently buy a blue dress?”

Her mother said, “No, Phoebe, I didn’t. But yesterday I saw a blue dress that I wanted and went back to the shop 5 times but just couldn’t get myself to spend the money.”

Take Action Challenge

This week, set an intention to connect with a loved one or pet who has passed on. Then, be open for your own personal sign or confirmation. You might smell a familiar fragrance, feel the brush of a hand on your cheek, hear your name called out of the blue, or simply feel their presence. If you tend to think this is unrealistic, suspend disbelief and allow yourself a new perspective. Remember, love lives on.

This week, I’m sharing Bob’s website that contains several videos about life after death, including a more in-depth interview with Anita Moorjani, and an interview with John Holland and Dr. Brian Weiss. You can find it here.

Week 13 – Saying Goodbye: Learning to let go

admin — Mon, 26 Mar 2012 01:03:47 +0000

Greetings!

Thank you for the feedback about my interview with Anita Moorjani, author of “Dying to Be Me.” I’m so glad that her near death experience and message of hope and self-love have touched you. If you haven’t had a chance to listen to our conversation, you can find it here.

If you’ve been thinking about attending one of our Writer’s Workshops, check out the cities here.

Have a great week!

Love,
Cheryl

p.s. – Need a little Divine Direction? Use the “Touch of Grace” button on our homepage here.

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Topic of the Week

Saying Goodbye

“How lucky I am to have something
that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
-Little Orphan Annie

Saying goodbye. It’s something we all do at various times in our lives. Some of us do it consciously and intentionally and some of us avoid it like the plague. This week, I’m saying goodbye to a dear friend who’s moving to Europe. While the trip marks an exciting new adventure in his life (and I’m very happy for him), I feel sad to see him go. It’s another chance to practice saying goodbye with open eyes and an open heart.

Here’s what I’ve learned about loss and endings:

1. Saying goodbye is a process not a destination.

Whether you’re saying goodbye to a relationship that’s ending, a child who’s gone off to college, a pet who has passed on, or a job you once loved, it takes time to fully acknowledge and appreciate all that has occurred. When we say goodbye, we never say goodbye to one person, one event, or one thing. We say goodbye to many experiences – the lessons learned, the challenges won and lost, the unfulfilled promises, or the unexpected joys. This takes time, patience, and a willingness to sift through and experience all of our feelings.

2. You must fully embrace the ending to allow a new beginning.

The best way to create the space for a great, new beginning is to fully participate in the ending. This means acknowledging what was with open eyes. I’ve learned to say goodbye with meaning and purpose by using the power of ritual. I couldn’t imagine moving out of my old home, for example, without taking the time to walk through every room with Michael, to reminisce about what happened there over time. The ritual of revisiting memories and feelings, both good and bad, allows us to honor and appreciate what we’ve been fortunate enough to experience.

3. Surrender to the sadness.

In my youth, I spent enormous amounts of time and energy trying to avoid the pain of saying goodbye – resources that could have been put to better use. I’ve since learned to accept and embrace the sadness as a normal part of the process. After all, the sadness simply means that we’re experiencing the loss of something that held significance in our lives.

Your loss has earned the right to pull at your heart. If you allow yourself to go through it instead of working hard to go around it, you’ll save yourself a whole lot of energy. You can’t feel joy without cultivating the space that comes from feeling pain.

There’s so much more to be said about saying goodbye, and this is simply my attempt at a start. I hope it helps you in dealing with an ending in your life. If the pain feels like too much, remember this: There’s a new beginning waiting to unfold. It’s just not time yet. When you fully honor what was, what will be will be worth the wait.

Take Action Challenge

This week, do some kind of ritual that honors an ending in your life. Throw away paperwork from an old job, write your college-bound son or daughter a letter, light a candle for someone who has passed on, or put away photographs from a relationship that’s no longer in your life. Whatever you do, do it with love and full intention. After all, your endings are just as important as your beginnings

This week’s video is almost 40 years old and it’s a brief lecture by Victor Frankl, author of “Man’s Search for Meaning.” It’s an inspiring clip and you can watch it here. Thanks, Richard!

Life Makeover For The Year 2012 (sm) is written and produced by Cheryl Richardson. If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint permission of this newsletter, please email: cheryl@cherylrichardson.com. © Copyright 1999-2012. Cheryl Richardson, P.O. Box 13, Newburyport, MA 01950. All rights reserved.